One Year Out

Today is not exactly a year from my graduation from college, but it feels like it: today Zach and I attended a grad party for a few of his (and my) good friends.

It has taken me this full year to begin to adjust to life as a member of the working mob. But finally I find myself taking it all in stride: This is what I do–I am a grant writer. And I write other things when I’m not at work. And none of this, even my creative writing, tells me or anyone who I am because who I fully am–who anyone is–is bigger than actions and occupations.
It is difficult to find a job where I get paid to do something good. Just tonight I was talking to a man who’d had a previous job constructing bombs. I’m not manufacturing destruction but education. And I’m good at what I do.
Figuring out how to live these little pieces and still be who I am takes time. Knowing myself takes time. But God holds these things in his hands, and sees who I am, and how it is I can become something more.

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